I always give myself such very good advice, but I very seldom follow it.
- Alice In Wonderland

Even artichokes have hearts.
- Amelie

Hate is baggage. Life's too short to be pissed off all the time, its just not worth it.
- American History X

I though of that old joke, y'know, the, this, this guy goes to a psychiatrist and says, 'Doc, uh, my brother's crazy. He thinks he's a chicken.' And, uh, the doctor says, 'Well, why don't you turn him in?' And the guy says, 'I would, but I need the eggs.' Well, I guess that's pretty much how I feel about relationships. Y'know, they're totally irrational and crazy and absurd and, but, uh, I guess we keep going through it because, uh, most of us need the eggs.
- Annie Hall

Gaston: Lefou, I'm afraid I've been thinking...
Lefou: A dangerous pastime.
Gaston: I know.
- Beauty & the Beast

Now it's time for one of my favorite cartoons. It's a sad, depressing story about a pathetic coyote who spends every waking moment in the futile persuit of a sadistic roadrunner, who mocks him and laughs at him as he is repeatedly crushed and maimed. I hope you enjoy it!
- UHF

Quint: I was going to propose to her.
Brodie: Where?
Quint: The Universal Tour.
Brodie: You're kidding. What part?
Quint: When Jaws popped out of the water.
Brodie: That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard.
Quint: Too bad I'm not trying to marry you.
- Mallrats

I find you very attractive. Your assertiveness tells me that you feel the same way about me. But ritual remains that we must do a series of platonic actions before we can have intercourse. But all I really want to do is have sex with you as soon as possible.
- A Beautiful Mind

A condom is the glass slipper for our generation. You slip one on when you meet a stranger. You dance all night, and then you throw it away. The condom, I mean, not the stranger.
- Fight Club

There are millions of people in the world, but in the end, it all comes down to one. I still panic sometimes, forget to breathe. But I know there's something beautiful in all my imperfections, a beauty that held out for me to see.. And a strength that can never be taken away.
- Crazy/Beautiful

Worker bees can leave
Even drones can fly away
The queen is their slave
- Fight Club

Beginnings are usually scary and endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts. You have to remember this when you find yourself at the beginning. Just give hope a chance to float up, and it will, too.
- Hope Floats

Hamilton: You wanna say something?
Brodie: Yeah. About a million things, but I can't express myself monosyllabically enough for you to understand it all.
- Mallrats

I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that.
- Say Anything

Lucas: Mark, who's your favorite singer?
Mark: Axl.
Lucas: Well if Axl Rose was driving down the highway, and saw Rex Manning stranded on the side of the road, do you think Axl Rose would stop and help him?
Mark: ...Does Axl have a jack?
- Empire Records

I have to remind myself that some birds aren't meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, the part of you that knows it was a sin to lock them up does rejoice. Still, the place you live in is that much more drab and empty that they're gone. I guess I just miss my friend.
- The Shawshank Redemption

I have wasted thousands of kisses on you..kisses that I thought were special because of your lips and your smile and all your color and life. I used to think that was the real you, when you smiled. But now I know you didn't mean any of it. You just save it all for your songs. Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed so tight.
- That Thing You Do ♥

When the people we love are stolen from us the thing we have to remember is to never stop loving them. Buildings burn, people die, but true love is forever.
- The Crow

What you know, you can't explain, but you feel it. You've felt it your entire life, that there's something wrong with the world. You don't know what it is, but it's there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad.
- The Matrix

"Jack": [on phone with Marla] Marla, did we ever have sex?
Marla: What? Do you mean did I think we were just having sex or making love?
"Jack": Marla just answer the question. Did we ever have sex.
Marla: Ok.You fuck me, then snub me. You love me, you hate me. You show me a sensitive side, then you turn into a total asshole. Is this a pretty accurate description of our relationship, Tyler?
"Jack": Wait. What did you just call me?
Marla: Tyler. Tyler Durden. Tyler Durden!
- Fight Club

Scarecrow: I haven't got a brain... only straw.
Dorothy: How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?
Scarecrow: I don't know... But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking... don't they?
Dorothy: Yes, I guess you're right.
- The Wizard of Oz

Life is like a mop. Sometimes life gets full of dirt and crud and hairballs and things and you gotta clean it out. You gotta stick it in here and rinse it off and start all over again. And sometimes life sticks to the floor so much that a mop, a mop, it's not good enough. You gotta get down there with like a toothbrush, you know, and you gotta really scrub 'cause you gotta get it off. But if that doesn't work, you can't give up. You gotta stand right up. You gotta run to a window and say, 'These floors are dirty as hell, and I'm not gonna take it any more!'
- UHF

I know it's a cornball thing, but love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? I say fall head over heels. Find someone you love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart... Run the risk, if you get hurt, you'll come back. Because the truth is, there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived... Stay open. Who knows? Lightning could strike.
- Meet Joe Black

To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering, one must not love; but then one suffers from not loving. Therefore, to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer, to suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love; to be happy then is to suffer, but suffering makes one unhappy; therefore to be unhappy one must love or love to suffer or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down.
- Love & Death

Hearts will never be practical until they are made unbreakable.
- The Wizard of Oz

Little Girl: ...and then Mommy kissed Daddy, and the angel told the stork, and the stork flew down from heaven, and put the diamond in the cabbage patch, and the diamond turned into a baby!
Pugsley: Our parents are having a baby too.
Wednesday: They had sex.
- Addams Family Values

"Jack": When people think you're dying, they really, really listen to you, instead of just...
Marla: ..Instead of just waiting for their turn to speak?
- Fight Club

AJ: ...you know, I got to tell her that I, uh, well, you know, that I uh...
Joe: love her.
AJ: Yeah, now how do I do that?
Joe: You say I love you. What do you want, written instructions?
- Empire Records.

I know you're out there. I can feel you now. I know that you're afraid... afraid of us. You're afraid of change. I don't know the future. I didn't come here to tell you how this is going to end. I came here to tell how it's going to begin. I'm going to hang up this phone and then show these people what you don't want them to see. I'm going to show them a world without you. A world without rules or controls, borders or boundaries. A world where anything is possible. Where we go from there is a choice I leave to you.
- The Matrix

And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it."
- Monty Python and the Holy Grail

If I had a world of my own, everything would be nonsense. Nothing would be what it is, because everything would be what it isn't. And contrary wise, what is, it wouldn't be. And what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?
- Alice in Wonderland

When you have insomnia, you're never really asleep, and you're never really awake.
- Fight Club

Jack Sparrow: "One question about your business, boy, or there's no use going: This girl... how far are you willing to go to save her?"
Will Turner: "I'd die for her."
Jack Sparrow: "Oh good. No worries then."
-Pirates of the Carribean

My dreams are a cruel joke. They taunt me. Even in my dreams, I'm an idiot... who knows he's about to wake up to reality. If I could only avoid sleep. But I can't. I try to tell myself what to dream. I try to dream that I'm flying. Something free. It never works.
- Vanilla Sky

Imogen: "You know what my fear is?"
Al: "What?"
Imogen: "One day, we'll pass each other on the street and have that..'artificial conversation.'"
- Down to You

1500 years ago, everybody 'knew' that the earth was the center of the universe. 500 years ago, everybody 'knew' that the earth was flat. And 15 minutes ago, you 'knew' that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you'll 'know' tomorrow.
- Men in Black

Mark: Empire Records, open 'til midnight, this is Mark.
[pause]
Mark: Midnight.
- Empire Records

Randal: Which did you like better? "Jedi" or "The Empire Strikes Back"?
Dante: "Empire."
Randal: Blasphemy!
Dante: "Empire" had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All "Jedi" had was a bunch of Muppets.
- Clerks

Hey, look up there. If there was a car crash ten blocks away, that window washer could probably see it. But that doesn't mean he's God, or even smarter than we are. But from where he's sitting, he can see a little further down the road.
- The Mothman Prophecies

Imagine if you suddenly learned that the people, the places, the moments most important to you were not gone, not dead, but worse, had never been. What kind of hell would that be?
- A Beautiful Mind

You are not your job. You are not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive. You are not the contents of your wallet. You are not your fucking khakis. You are the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.
- Fight Club